For some, this whole "Day of Love" thang is just a pain in the ass. Not everybody has somebody to love. You feel left out. For others, you just can't find a way to show how much you love. You feel inadequate. And, for others, your lover just can't get it right. You feel unappreciated. So, for all of you, I have put an end to the misery. Valentine's Day is officially dead. Oh, they will try to convince you next year that this was all a joke, but, when they do, just remember you saw this picture on the Internet. That means it must be true.

And, for those of you who found reassurance of affection  and confirmation of your self worth on this now DEAD DAY, think about the one you love every day. Now that you won't have artificial sentiment on pre-printed cards , over-priced flowers you order online, over-crowded restaurants that serve stuff you don't recognize  and very unflattering , cheap lengerie  to fall back on, do what you feel in your heart. Or, your loins. I say to you, accept the burden of proving your love every day. In some small way, share your feelings with those who really mean so much to you.

Ladies, start today by opening some door for him wearing nothing but a raincoat. (Make sure you do a bit of personal grooming before you make this offering.) Hand him a small glass of Irish Whiskey, with one ice cube. (You might suggest something to do with that in very short order.) Have the History Channel, or Showtime on the TV with the sound turned off. (You don't want him to get distracted.) Let him lay on the couch, feet and all, covered by that raincoat you just took off.  Make an exaggerated exit to the kitchen and prepare a large bowl of his favorite ice cream, covered with his favorite topping. (Bring that bottle of chocolate syrup with you. You might suggest something to do with that in short order.) Join him on the couch. Enjoy the ice cream.

Or, guys, instead of plopping your over-worked, fat butt down in front of the TV after work, escort her to her favorite chair, offer her a  glass of her favorite  wine, hand her the remote, and you cook dinner. (Something simple. Read the directions on the box.) You help the kids with the homework, as best you can, and you make sure the kids get to bed on time. (Accept,going in, that no one expects you to be able to pull this off without some help from her at some point. But, make the effort. And, leave the wine bottle by her chair.) Pour yourself a glass of whatever she's having and eventually lead her to  that hot tub of water you ran as you were putting the kids to bed. Candle on. Lights out. In the tub. And talk. Just talk about whatever is on her mind. No boundaries. No arguments. Just listen to what she has to say. (Make sure you brought that bottle of wine with you.)

I realize these evenings won't happen very often, if at all. But you can think about making it happen... every day. Maybe a quick kiss on the shoulder when she not looking, an unexpected "I really do love you" over meatloaf, or take the dog out tonight without being asked. Your best "love muscle" is your brain. Exercise it daily. Enjoy the benefits for life.

Your friend,

TJ